DuckSouth.com

Regulations for Hunting Attorneys (G)

Bill to Regulate the Hunting and Harvesting of Attorneys PC 370.00

370.01 Any person with a valid in-state rodent or snake hunting license may also hunt and harvest attorneys for recreational and sport (non-commercial) purposes.

370.02 Taking of attorneys with traps or dead-falls is permitted. The use of United States currency as bait, however, is prohibited.

370.03 The willful killing of attorneys with a motor vehicle is prohibited, unless such vehicle is an ambulance being driven in reverse. If an attorney is accidentally struck by a motor vehicle, the dead attorney should be removed to the roadside, and the vehicle should proceed immediately to the nearest car wash.

370.04 It is unlawful to chase, herd or harvest attorneys from a power boat, helicopter or aircraft.

370.05 It is unlawful to shout, "WHIPLASH", "AMBULANCE", or "FREE SCOTCH" for the purposes of trapping attorneys.

370.06 It is unlawful to hunt attorneys within 100 yards of BMW, Mercedes or Porsche dealerships, except on Wednesday afternoon.

370.07 It is unlawful to hunt attorneys within 200 yards of courtrooms, law libraries, health clubs, country clubs, hospitals or brothels.

370.08 If an attorney gains elective office, it is not necessary to have a license to hunt, trap or possess the same.

370.09 It is unlawful for a hunter to wear a disguise as a reporter, accident victim, physician, chiropractor or tax accountant for the purpose of hunting attorneys.

370.10 Bag and Possession Limits per day:
Yellow-bellied sidewinders, 2;
Two-faced tortfeasors, 1;
Back-stabbing divorce litigators, 3;
Horn-rimmed cut-throats, 2;
Minutiae-advocating dirtbags, 4.
Honest attorneys protected (Endangered Species Act).

ARS 8007.21 It is illegal to take attorneys with a moving vehicle unless there are no measurable skid marks at the kill site.
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LOL! I have a good buddy over from AL that I'll be hunting with for the rest of the week? Guess what he does for a living? I'll print this and show it to him.

Wingman

i am waiting on a reply from GulfCoast...haha... a few more are around this site also.... guess they could have done it with a Judge instead.... that was close......whew.....

judge jb

Know why lawyers are prohibited from taking Viagra?

It makes them stiff all over.

Now that was low!

It made me laugh like hell !!!!! have a good one guys and gals!!!!!!! [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]

I HOPE I MAKE THAT ENDANGERED SPECIES LIST! YOU WON'T HEAR FROM GC FOR A WHILE, HE'S OUT HUNTIN WHILST I'M HERE TRYING TO GET WORKERS' COMP PITANCE PAY FOR POOR WORKING CLASS SLOBS.

THIS IS A GOOD POST, THOUGH. THE SECRETARIES WILL GET A HOOT!

and to think my favorite attorneys' name is Dick....

judge jb

Geez Dave: "working class slobs"???? Yer an honest guy, I will vouch for you. They would DIE if they knew how many attorneys are on this board that are traveling incognito.

I am on the endangered species list, too! But in the interest of my fellows who are not, here is my proposition:

Duckhuntalot has 24 hours to change his post to either "doctor hunting regulations" or "chiropractor hunting regulations" or "used car salesmen regulations" or else I corruptly use my power to edit his posts to create an image of him humping GH22 or a hog, whichever is worse, that shows up every time that he posts. Fair enough? [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]

My personal favorite:
Q) What is black and brown and looks really good on a lawyer?
A) A rotweiler

FUNNY, FUNNY, FUNNY!!!!!!!

Jeesshh! Did someone strike a nerve there GulfCoast?! [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]

I guess I am too late to edit that post.

I left another one though!!!!!!