DuckSouth.com

Talking about a crescent wrench: hand me that chinese socket set.

A 3 lb ball peen hammer: hand me the persuader

Screwed up as a soup sandwich

Ain't got sense enough to get out of the rain

"that's queer as a football racket"
"That's F-ed up like a pile of bream hooks"
"That boy would argue with a fence post"
"Slick as greased owl shiz"

Smoke68 wrote:If a frog had pockets he'd carry a pistol and shoot snakes.

And if a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his butt when he hopped!

Smoke68 wrote:If a frog had pockets he'd carry a pistol and shoot snakes.

And if a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his butt when he hopped!

As my old college professor Howard Miller used to say....

"You're lower than a snake's d*** in a wagon wheel track!"

"He's as dumb as a billie goat, born on Wednesday looking for Sunday both ways!"

My daughter was so ugly we had to tie a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her!

I seen prettier heads in a feed sack!

Queer as a three dollar bill.
Got Buck teeth so bad he can eat corn thru a picket fence.

Well I'll be John Brown and Let me tell you one cotton picking thing was two of my dad's favorites

I gotta find a toilet I got a turtle head popping out!!

I gotta find a toilet I got a turtle head popping out!!

The only thang lonelier 'n a puppy in a corner...is the corner when the puppy's gone.

That guy is harder to read than a Russian newspaper.

That dog won't hunt
That's as fine as frog hair.

That looks good from afar but it is far from good!

My grandpa always told me "The Lord ruined a good democrat when he made you white"

With friends like you, I don't need to Know any c*@ks^@K#&s!!!!