COMPUTER VIRUSES DEFINED
The AL GORE virus: causes your computer to just keep
counting.
The CLINTON virus: gives you a 7-inch hard drive with
NO memory.
The BOB DOLE (AKA: VIAGRA) virus: makes a new hard
drive out of an old floppy.
The LEWINSKY virus: sucks all the memory out of your
computer, then e- mails everyone about what it did.
The RONALD REAGAN virus: saves your data, but forgets
where it is stored.
The JESSE JACKSON virus: warns you constantly about
illegitimate file reproduction, while illegitimately reproducing
files in the background.
The MIKE TYSON virus: quits after two bytes.
The OPRAH WINFREY virus: your 300 MB hard drive shrinks
to 100 MB, then slowly expands to restabilize around 200 MB.
The JACK KEVORKIAN virus: deletes all old files.
The PROZAC virus: totally screws up your RAM, but your
processor doesn't care.
The JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus: only attacks minor files.
The ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER virus: terminates some files,
leaves, but will be back.
and last but not least ...
The LORENA BOBBITT virus: reformats your hard drive
into a 3.5-inch floppy, then discards it through Windows
Do you reckon I'm getting like GC? Too much time on my hands?
