As things seem a bit slow today...

[crow]

...how about a New Year's joke?

Three duck hunters were talking about New Year's Resolutions.

First hunter says, "I was tired of making my own resolutions, so I decided I would make one for my wife. I went home and told her that I was tired of eating all that fast food and take out; I wanted some decent home cooked meals and I wanted then hot and on the table when I got home. Well, the first day, I didn't see nothin'. The second day I didn't see nothin', but the third day, I got home and there was my favorite vegetables and cornbread on the table!"

The second guy says, "Yeah, I did the same thing. I told my wife I was tired of our house looking like a pig pen. I wanted the house spic and span, the furniture dusted and the bathrooms sparkling. The first day I came in, I didn't see nothin' changed. The second day I couldn't see nothin'. But, the third day, I came home and the house was spotless!

The third hunter said, "By Golly, I'm gonna do the same thing tonight" A couple of weeks later, they all met up to go hunt again and the first two asked him how it went with his resolutions for his wife.

"Well, I told her I wanted nothing but home cooked meals from now on. No more fast food. I told her I wanted the house to shine like new money, no more junky house. And, I told her we were gonna have sex whenever I wanted to. No more of this 'I have a headache' stuff. The first day, I couldn't see nothin'. The second day, I couldn't see nothin'. The third day I could see a little bit out of my left eye!

[laduck]

How true it is. Sometimes it is hard to stay on wife's good side. I think that she cares more for the lab than me. She told me once, "if something happens to Boeuf while you all are out hunting, don't you come home either". Jack

Shoot them sprigs on their first pass!

[judge jb]

as a BATTERED HUSBAND who goes to meetings, i UNDERSTAND.......

judge jb